June 16th was...

Exactly eight years ago today, I went to a party.  This wasn't just any party, it was Indy Stein (everyone's love of their middle school lives)'s Bar-Mitzvah.  I didn't know then that this party would change my life.  Okay it didn't really, but there was something indescribable about it.

Indy didn't give out socks that said "I rocked my socks off with Indy" (although that would have been convenient because really, who wants to keep their shoes on for the duration of a whole bar-mitzvah?  Certainly not me, those things are unnecessarily long) but he gave out something even better.

Bar-Mitzvah's tend to have themes.  If memory serves me right, Mike Hill's was sports, fitting because he likes sports.  My cousin Maddy's was Japan, fitting because she just returned from living in Japan for three years.  Jessica Buchenholz's was "online with Jessica," fitting because she probably had used the internet at some point in her life.  Then there were more obscure ones for example, Liza Heyman's was simply "L!"  I still have the sweatshirt she gave out, but never wear it in fear people will think I'm a Loser"!"  Which leads me to the next theme: mine.  I will not disclose the nature of it publicly for as long as I live, but those of you who know what it was, try to remember it was a weird stage in my life and I had just quit Baton twirling so it was kind of a step up.

Then there was Indy's.  Which may literally go down in history as the best bar-mitzvah theme ever.  What was it?  One word: Indy.  His name.  "His theme was himself?  How Narcissistic!" You may be thinking.  But that's not how it went down.  First, he made a grand entrance dressed as Indiana Jones con whip.  Such a performer.  Then, the Bar-Mitzvah occurred like any other, that is, until the party favors were opened.  

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

In honor of the eighth year anniversary of Indy Stein's Bar-Mitzvah, a list compiled over the years by Jenna, Jessica, and myself plus some new ones (rotate to both sides):

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

(Yes, it was the same day as mine and yes, it was a problem)

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

Make custom t-shirts at CustomInk.com

The list could go on and on...

Happy ano Indy

Love, Sloan

MTV Movie Awards

Things we NEED to talk about: The MTV Movie Awards.  Were we being Punk'd?  Maybe.   I can't take MTV seriously for at least 2 weeks now.

First things first:  Andy Samberg, marry me.  However, I disagree with your choice to allow LeAnne Rimes, Forest Whitiker, and Chris Isaak to sing a bad medley of your songs. We wanted youuuu, or at least, Justin Timberlake.  It's okay you can make it up to me later.

Let's look at some of the retarded choices the "fans" chose. 

BEST MOVIE 

• Twilight
• The Dark Knight
• High School Musical 3: Senior Year
• Iron Man
• Slumdog Millionaire

Really?  Really?!?  I notice that Slumdog Millionaire is on that list.  Oh wait, oh wait, you're right MTV the Oscars were wrong.  Twilight was soo much deeper.

BEST FEMALE PERFORMANCE

• Angelina Jolie - Wanted
• Anne Hathaway- Bridewars
• Kate Winslet - The Reader
• Kristen Stewart - Twilight
• Taraji P. Henson - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Let's talk Kristen Stewart.  First, you're not yet famous enough to be that shit faced at an award show.  That's like Anna Nicole Smith status.  Nor are you famous enough to wear Converse Sneakers to an award show.  That's like Pete Wentz status.  I guess Prince could also pull it off, but he won't.  Respek.  Oh, and although not required, it's typically expected that one washes ones hair before, oh, leaving the house let alone receiving multiple awards for a movie that doesn't deserve it.

BEST MALE PERFORMANCE

• Christian Bale - The Dark Knight
• Robert Downey Jr. - Iron Man
• Shia LaBeouf - Eagle Eye
• Vin Diesel - Fast & Furious
• Zac Efron - High School Musical 3: Senior Year

Zac Efron's hot, and there was that one erotic shirtless scene, but still.  Robert DJ or Christian Bale shouldaaaa won.  Even though I still have a crush on Shia LaBeouf from Even Steven Days, I can't be selfish during these times.

BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE FEMALE

• Amanda Seyfried - Mamma Mia!
• Ashley Tisdale - High School Musical 3: Senior Year
• Freida Pinto - Slumdog Millionaire
• Miley Cyrus- Hannah Montana: The Movie
• Vanessa Hudgens - High School Musical 3: Senior Year
• Kat Dennings - Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist

WTF.  I'm not even gonna go there.  ANYONE would have been better.  Nicolas Cage in "Wicker Man" would have been better, and he's not even a female.

MAD.