JAMIE SPINNER AND THE COMMONS '06

Back by popular demand:  the infamous article about the commons being closed because of Jamie Spinner.  Originally from the Denebola (Newton South High School Newspaper) '06

Dark Ages '06

Stacy Greenberg

It seems to be a general consensus that last week felt particularly long.  My mom says it was because of the cold weather, I say it was something else.  Something far more serious: the wheeler commons were closed.  You may have wondered why, when people left class to go to the bathroom, they were gone for less than 10 minutes.  You may have wondered about the increased traffic on the first floor of wheeler in between the office and the commons.  You may have wondered why everyone appeared clinically depressed.  The short bathroom breaks, the traffic, the depression, were due to the fact that the wheeler commons were shut down and the class of '06 did not know what to do with themselves. 

What was the cause of this travesty?  Rumor has it, it involved senior Jamie Spinner otherwise known as J-spiiiins, and some kind of sliding across some kind of table.  Apparently this is not acceptable.  A nearby teacher, Ms. Stonehill of the English department (now known as Lord Voldemort), saw this occur, and the result: shut down of the commons.  

A little history: this was not the first time the commons were closed.  Last year, it was due to lack of respect for the "laws."  The alleged laws of the room include important policies such as;  a conversational level of sound (yeah right...), one person to a chair (Becky and Julien), and no card playing. That last one sounds reasonable because, really, who plays cards in there anyway?  However, no where on the list does it say: Jamie Spinner is not allowed to slide across a table... but I guess there is always room for amendments.  

Last year we got the commons  re-opened by signing a piece of paper that made a selection of us "Commons Monitors..." it didn't work out.  

So, what happened to the poor children who spend more time in the commons then in the classroom?  After class I, and many others walked by there hoping a miracle had happened and the heavenly lights would be on and life would once again be good. Instead, we were greeted by miserable, lost, homeless, seniors.  

"I think some people might actually lose friends because of it," said senior Tal Hartstein during the week of madness, and I concur.  This is because we rely on the commons as mutual territory between the cliques and therefore have watched relationships blossom and grow in this room.  Without it, we might have eventually forgotten about each other.  Proactive students did their best.  One day there was even an attempt to blockade the hallway (I guess our attempt at activism.)  Since that didn't work, we wondered, what will?  

Turns out that a little snow and a bad call by the superintendent on Friday did the trick.  The commons were temporarily reopened so we wouldn't leave and get in an accident during free blocks.  Authorities seem to have forgotten about the incident.  Thank God.  

Next year we will all be off to different places and will no longer have the wheeler commons.  We will probably miss it.  On the bright side, this week slightly prepared us for what is to come. I guess the moral of the story is: Jamie do not slide across tables, it is no longer allowed.